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OPINION

Litigation, Castigation, and Donation

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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It’s been a long time since I’ve reminded my readers what a bunch psychotic feminists we have in charge of the Womyn’s movement at Appalachian State University in Boone, North Carolina. Just take a few moments to click on this article and read what the unhinged libbers are doing with your tax dollars. Apparently, small, handheld vibrators are not enough. They need your tax dollars to pay for giant sex organs, too.

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If an undergraduate psychology major lacks the good sense to know that it isn’t a good idea to dress up as a six-foot tall sex organ and pose for the school newspaper, she probably isn’t bright enough to be in college. Maybe she hasn’t considered the possibility that for years a Google search of her name will locate a picture of her dressed as a six foot cha cha. And maybe she hasn’t considered the possibility that she’s not likely to be considered qualified to give psychological counseling to other people if she likes to dress up as a giant sex organ.

On the other hand, it might be her goal to work in a Womyn’s Center the rest of her life, in which case she should be just fine. The job searches at Womyn’s Centers are always conducted by people who need to be in therapy.

But those who sponsor obscene plays like The Vagina Monologues think that anything goes as long as they are willing to donate the proceeds to a worthy cause like a local domestic violence shelter. That’s what led me to predict several years ago that we would soon be seeing strippers and prostitutes at Women’s Center events across the country.

The popularity of the Sex Workers Art Show has proven that I was far more prescient than I would have liked to have been. And don’t be surprised if universities soon stop bringing in prostitutes and strippers from the outside and start allowing the students to strip and prostitute themselves in order to save a little money in future fund-raisers. Before long, your daughter could be the center of attention at one of these university-sponsored events.

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But I’ve been spending too much time lately complaining about the obvious problems rampant political correctness causes for our campuses and our culture. Today, I plan to focus on three things I’ve been doing to combat these problems. I’ll hope you’ll listen carefully to the following:

1. Litigate. One of the reasons we are seeing these profane displays on campuses is, ironically, because of campus speech codes. At Georgia Tech a couple of years ago the feminists used the “c-word” during The Vagina Monologues. When a couple of brave young ladies named Ruth and Orit put up a “We are not (c-words)” poster on campus, the feminists tried to censor them claiming the c-word is offensive unless uttered by a feminist. Ruth and Orit sued and won overturning the speech code in the process.

2. Castigate. My new book “Feminists Say the Darndest Things” is a good example of how to use humor to humiliate those inclined to dress as sex organs in the name of gender equality. The fine ladies at the Clare Booth Luce Policy Institute have recently written a parody, The Vagina Maladies, doing essentially the same thing.

3. Donate. Funds obtained from the castigation prong of attacks on radical PC feminism can be donated to worthy causes. I spent my book advance applying for the adoption of a little girl from Vietnam. We need feminists to stop dressing up like sex organs and instead help to save little girls from sexual exploitation in Southeast Asia. I am also giving away 100% of any bonuses I get from Penguin USA to Pastor Jackson Mwangi’s Hope 127 Project in Nakuru, Kenya. And 10% gross from every column I write and every speech I give will go there, too. It isn’t enough to be opposed to abortion. We need to show radical feminists that we mean what we say when it is time to take care of the little children nobody else will care for and love.

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When speech code-supporting feminists teach seminars on masturbation, we need to respond with more than just litigation and castigation. We need to show them that we can effect real change for women with donations that do not result in degradation. We must, above all, shower women and children with love more powerful than the rage and stupidity of radical feminists.

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