It's a snap commenting on yesterday's elections the morning after. The hard
part is saying something about the elections before the results are in,
which is when this column is being written. And my crystal ball is in the
shop, dangit.
The late not-so-great Westbrook Pegler started out as a talented
sportswriter and engaging political commentator back in the last century,
but wound up a sodden right-wing crank. He once confessed that, contrary to
popular belief, it wasn't his hatred of Eleanor Roosevelt that had driven
him bonkers. It was having to write on Monday and not being published till
Friday in those slow-motion, Via Air Mail days. He should have tried writing
a Wednesday column about a Tuesday election that hadn't happened yet.
But that's no problem in our high-tech age. Thanks to the modern miracle of
public opinion polls, with all their latest scientific advances, we now know
just how the elections will go even before the polls are closed. Why go
through the formality of counting the votes?
Here's what that kind of thing leads to: Not long ago I spent the day of the
New Hampshire primary pounding out a trenchant analysis of why Barack Obama
had scored so decisive a victory over Hillary Clinton in that early test of
their electoral strength. We all knew just how the vote would come out. The
polls had told us: It would be Obama by a mile; his lead was insurmountable.
Here at the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, our editorial for the next day
analyzing the significance of Barack Obama's dramatic victory was in type
well before the polls closed in New Hampshire. Early in the evening as the
election returns began dribbling in, Sen. Clinton took a slight lead, which
surely would fade as the night went on.
Always thinking ahead, my syndicated column along the same presumptuous
lines had already been dispatched for distribution first thing in the
morning. All a couple of us on the editorial page had to do was hang around
the newsroom just for safety's sake. Miss Hillary's edge was sure to fade as
the night wore on, wiped out by the Obama tide. It was a sure bet. Even the
Clinton camp was preparing to explain why its candidate's loss in New
Hampshire wasn't all that serious.
But a funny thing happened on the way to Senator Obama's triumph in New
Hampshire. It never happened. Instead, Senator Clinton's early lead widened
instead of disappearing, and by our final deadline - our last chance to yank
that editorial - she was eking out a victory. Discomfited as I was, I did
the only thing a man could: laugh out loud.
Barack Obama's victory had turned into the surest thing since DEWEY DEFEATS
TRUMAN in 1948. I don't think I've ever identified so strongly with Col.
McCormick's old Chicago Tribune, which ran that premature and now historic
headline back in '48. The picture of Harry Truman proudly holding it up has
become an iconic image by now.
Quick like an editor, I pulled the not so prescient editorial I'd spent so
much time polishing, and found something less embarrassing to run in its
place. And I hastened to get an e-mail off to my editor at the, yes, Tribune
syndicate in Chicago. It began: MANDATORY KIL. Lest my column see the light
of day.
Happily, it didn't. Other columnists weren't so lucky. Next morning, various
ponderous pieces analyzing The Fall of the House of Clinton were filling the
ether. Suffice it to say that there was a lot of egg on a lot of faces.
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